How do you know that you shop online too much?
When the UPS guy says “oh you moved! You used to live at so and so address” 
Disciplinary Action
How many times I have asked you not to switch on the laptop?
But, I needed to see something…
Excuses, Excuses and more excuses… When are you going to learn that I don’t like seeing you busy with laptop?
I know I have been trying..I don’t go online much these days.
“Much” *a big frown* Do you think I am not aware that you browse net in night? You know I have caught you red handed many times. And every time you give me same excuse.
Enough of warnings and now you need to be taught a lesson. Here goes your space bar key in air *space bar key traveling in a defined trajectory*
Let this serve both of you as a lesson for future. Are you listening Mamma & Daddy? I don’t like being this way, so please don’t do this again. Remember I still love you . *with a big grin on her face*
TeleMarketing
I hate & dislike picking up calls from unknown number. The main reason of this hatred and dislike is the “fear of unknown”. Within seconds of seeing an unknown number blinking on my phone screen, my brain freezes.
Somehow I gather courage and pick up the phone and say “Hello”. This is when my brain starts functioning again. Most of the times these calls are from telemarketing companies.
I was able to block these calls by adding my number to DNC registry. But here comes the catch, charitable organizations and any company with which you’ve done any transactions (after adding your number to DNC) can still call you.
These days I am most afraid of the charities. I donate (clothes/household stuff/baby gear/money) to charities of my choice as and when I have these items. Now these charities and all others get your information and they start calling you 3-4 times a day. If I have donated these items just now, how can I have them again i.e. next day or in a week’s time for donation?
I will donate when I want to and to the charities I want. So for God’s sake, stop harassing me.
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Do you remember this post of mine Unsolicited Calls & Me? So I received a phone call from them again. This time it was a girl on the other hand.
Caller: Hello Ma’am, We are calling from So and So and are you aware that we are receiving many errors from your computer..Blah Blah…..
She was reading a dialogue from the script given to her. How do I know? There wasn’t a single pause or full stop in the very long sentence spoken by her. I got the intuition that she was reading from the text. Well I might be wrong and probably she would have memorized it.
I wanted to play along.
Me: Are you sure you have the right person?
Caller: Yes Ma’am
Me: Oh ! From how many days?
Caller: From last few days, may be a week
Aha! moment for me as we had moved to a different house a week ago and we had gotten our internet/phone/TV connectivity on that day itself.
Me: You have the wrong person. Don’t call this number again else I’ll complain against your company.
Caller: Ma’am, please listen..Please open this site etc…
I interrupted her
Me: Please if there is anything wrong, I’ll hear from my service provider and not some random company. Don’t make the mistake that I am a novice. Have a good day and please cross this number from your list.
I wonder how many people would fall for such tricks or have already fallen for such tricks?
Aankhon Ki Sharam
“Aankhon ki Sharam” or “Aankh ka paani” are two commonly used sayings in Hindi language. The meaning of this phrase is “shame” and these phrases are commonly used when talking about a girl (most of the times).
So recently I heard this term from someone and ever since I am thinking about it. She used the term saying girls in India have “aankhon ki sharam” whereas here girls (Indian girls) are different.
Some of you might already know that I have a younger sister and the search for perfect life partner for her is on. She talks about what she wants in the guy and what not. My mother once mentioned that how times have changed. When she was of marriageable age (by the way, she got married when she was 16 years old) and her elder brother was searching for a match, if she remained in the room while they discussed the groom’s family, it was considered as shameless act or “aankhon ki sharam marr gayi hai”. So she never discussed or participated in any of the pre-marriage activities.
Mine is a love marriage and when I had told my mother about DH, first she agreed. I didn’t want to get married immediately but I wanted to let her know that I am seeing someone. Then after few hours, she was going back and forth on her decision. During that she uttered few words, basically worried about how society is going to react and by society she meant her brothers & nephews. Then she said, she won’t let anyone know that I chose my husband else they will say that I don’t have any shame (or in Hindi “Ankhon ki sharam”).
It is such a vague thing to define. For someone
- holding a guy’s hand would be a shameless act.
- smiling while talking to a guy would be a shameless act
- choosing your own life partner would be a shameless act
- talking about your own marriage (impending) would be a shameless act
- not taking duppata would be a shameless act
- sitting in the same room as your FIL or elder BIL would be a shameless act
- responding back to unreasonable demands of elders would be a shameless act
- a guy dropping a girl after darkness would be considered a shameless act – oh yes, it happens…
The list can go on and on.
I am just confused what does it mean when someone uses the phrase “aankhon ki sharam” or “aankhon ka paani marr jaana”. Who determines the correct usage of this phrase? And whether such phrases exists in your mother tongue?
Dreams do come true!!
Some of you might already be aware of the fact that I’m a crazy dreamer and I have shared here some of those dreams.
Do you remember this post of mine on dreams and this post on abstract thinking riddle?
When I had asked how would you interpret 2/2 and I got many answers. None of them were wrong as it could represent anything but only Gunjan wrote what I had in mind.
When I wrote that post, my interpretation was “2 under 2″, which meant two kids under the age of two 
Today at our anatomy scan, we had the option of finding out the gender of our baby and we did…It helps us in preparing for baby like buying clothes, baby gears etc..
In my post on dreams, I had recorded of having a dream (even before munchkin’s birth) that I have a girl and a boy… It would be true in June
Tag & Award
Garima has tagged me for the Versatile Blogger Award. Thank you Garima but honestly speaking I don’t deserve being called versatile. But thank you for being so generous.
The Rules for the Versatile Blogger Award says:
Thank the Blogger who nominated you and Add the Versatile Blogger Award picture to your Blog Post
Thank you Garima
Nominate 15 fellow Bloggers – Inform the Bloggers of their nomination
All the bloggers I read or are active have already been tagged and awarded.
Share 7 Random things about yourself
- I have certain rules when I meet new people. I don’t like when someone starts asking personal questions on the first meeting. I don’t like to disclose or discuss personal issues in first few meetings.
- If you are a stranger, I met on the bus-stop or in bus or in some hotel or any other place, I wouldn’t tell you my real name or phone number or my locality. Yeah I am weird like that…
- Trust me, you wouldn’t want to watch a suspense movie with me. Why? Because I can very easily tell you the ending. DH calls me “Karamchand”
- I don’t like to leave my home at a set time every day. One day I’ll leave at 7:30 am and another day at 8:00 am and then next day at 6:30 am. I don’t know why I do this. But I have been doing this forever.
- Have you watched “Sleeping with the Enemy”? If yes, then in cleanliness aspect, I am like Julia Robert’s husband. These are DH’s words not mine. Well this was before munchkin. Now I have learned to let go of certain things.
- My best friend, close friends and DH, all of them have something in common except me. I never thought that they will be the most important people in my life. I thought and felt at that time that these are “Hello and Bye” type relations. I am glad that I was wrong.
- I am not afraid of needles or surgeries. But a tiny tablet to be swallowed makes me nervous.
Guilty as charged
While growing up (even now) my mother, sister and brother used to sit together and talk or watch TV. You may ask where was I? I used to be by the window in other room, looking blankly in space. If I happened to be in the same room, it was just my physical presence, my mind used to wander around. I was quiet at home and hardly spoke (except to fight with my brother or sister).
Sometimes my mother used to jokingly comment that “I am a snob” or “I don’t find their topics of conversations interesting”. It was never like that, I guess I just prefer being alone and at peace. My mother knows me very well as she has seen me like this forever.
When I call at my home, I usually talk with my mother. I ask about everyone and just listen to her. If my mother is not available and my sister picks up the call, our conversation gets wrapped under 1 minute. Yes we sisters are like that, we just don’t find anything to talk about except to ask general well-being. My elder brother is married and has a son. I would have spoken to my Bhabhi on occasions like B’days, festivals, New years etc. But she never complains that I don’t call her.
I accept that I don’t call my Bhabhi regularly, neither do we share a strong bond (haven’t got a chance to get to know each other, never stayed together more than 2 days) . But there is one thing, when we talk, we don’t complain that the other person hasn’t called in a long time. Because then, we both are at fault.
I know I don’t talk much with my sister or brother, but this doesn’t mean I don’t love them. For me talking daily and being there for them when needed are two different things. But then they are my blood, they know me very well and probably that’s why they never complain.
Now coming to my in-laws, I never got a chance to know them very well. I hardly stayed with them for 2-3 days after marriage. And those 2-3 days, our house was full of guests, so you can guess the amount of interaction. I am an introvert and I take a long time to open up to people.
My husband has an elder brother, married with 2 kids. I don’t know a thing about my SIL (DH’s bhabhi). I speak with my SIL on B’days, festivals, New Years etc (just the way I do it with my family except my mom). And hell every time I don’t hear the end of “not calling her”. It’s me who calls her every-time (even when I was in India).
I know I’m at fault here, but when we do speak, I am stuck. I can’t think anything to talk about other than inquiring general well-being. And she would in reply ask me “So What’s new?” and I would end up saying “Nothing, just same old routine” . To which she would again ask “So what’s new?” 
I know she might want to have better relations with me and believe me I too want that. But how do I change myself? I cannot change myself. I need to know the other person very well before I can speak to them freely on phone. I need Face to Face time (in person). I am one of those people, who observe others and then decide what to speak.
I guess I am just tired of hearing people complain when they do not take any action to change things. Why can’t we be happy and not expect anything. There are many friends, with whom I do not speak for years (not even on FB) but when we talk, it’s like we were never out of touch.
I am just ranting here because sometimes these things get overwhelming for me. I know these issues are nothing as compared to what others face in their life, but I just wanted to get this off my chest.
Three decades ago
Three decades ago, when she was born, her grandmother (paternal) cried and mourned for 4 days. Nobody from the family came to see both mother and daughter. Newborn girl’s father was far away in a different city. The hospital expense that he sent, never reached his wife.
Both mother and daughter were left alone in the hospital without any food or water. Yes it was a government hospital with very fewer facilities in a small town. Can you imagine a woman who had just delivered a baby going hungry for days? She couldn’t walk properly but still managed to come home with her newborn baby in a rickshaw. The rickshaw guy was kind enough than her in-laws who made him wait for money for a long time…
Nobody spoke to mother daughter, nobody ever tried to pick up the newborn even when she was crying. Mother didn’t get any rest and started doing household chores while holding her newborn daughter in arms. She kept her baby near, be it while washing clothes or cooking food. Everyone in the house made fun of her and told her you are spoiling your baby.
One evening, the mother was working in kitchen and she thought she heard her baby cry. She went in the room where she had put down her asleep daughter. To her shock she couldn’t find her there. The grandmother and her friend were sitting on the heavy quilt, that they had spread on the bed themselves. When the mother enquired about the baby, they said they don’t know. The mother was outraged and she told them the baby was on the bed and she asked them to move immediately. They didn’t budge from their place saying look elsewhere.
It is true that seemingly meek mothers become tigress when their offspring is in danger. She gathered all her strength and pushed the two women aside and moved the quilt. Her daughter was struggling for breath and colorless. She picked her up immediately and took her in open air. Later grandmother came and said she didn’t see the girl sleeping on bed and was laughing over her action. No remorse, no apology. How could they not see a baby sleeping on bed? How could they not hear the cries?
This happened with me and my mother. I don’t have a single memory of my grandparents(paternal) or paternal relatives (siblings of my father) showering their affections on either me or my sister. Believe me, I’m not dying for their love, but who were they to decide our fate? Thanks to my mother’s efforts, I’m alive and living my life happily.
The sad thing is still they think education ruined us. They still want to torture my mother. But they have forgotten one thing,” She is not alone.”
Saloon Drama
So far life has provided me enough opportunities to see and live in different cities. No two places are same but I have seen the Saloon drama is mostly same.
I started visiting saloon after my school i.e. when I joined college. Before that my mother used to cut/trim my hairs. So my first trip to a saloon happened in Pune and thereafter in various other cities.
I have been to umpteen number of saloons and all showed same behavior.
* First time in any saloon
SL (Saloon Lady): Where did you go earlier, they didn’t cut your hairs properly or didn’t shape your eyebrows properly?
Me: Just smiles..
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* After many days, same saloon (they have forgotten that I was there before)
SL: Where did you go earlier, they didn’t cut your hairs properly or didn’t shape your eyebrows properly?
Me: Smiles and wondering the color of her face if tell her that it was her 
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* Liar Liar, Pants on Fire
SL: So did you colored your hair?
Me: Yes
SL: Where did you get it done?
Me: I did it myself..
SL: It is not proper. You should make an appointment or if you have time, I can do it today
Me: Well I don’t have time today. May be some other day.
SL: Fine and she continues her job
Few minutes later, haircut done and I’m at the reception and after paying for the service, I’m about to leave.
Receptionist: This haircut suits you.
Me: Smiles
Receptionist: Did they do hair color as well?
Me: Wondering what she would say and I nod “yes”
Receptionist: It’s perfect
Me: Again smile, wondering whether to tell her what the truth?
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*Don’t ask if you can’t remember
SL: Are you here for the first time (she meant her saloon)?
Me: Yes
After few days again
SL: Are you here for the first time?
Me: Yes
After many-many such conversations and visits
SL: Are you here for the first time?
Me: No, I have been here before. But saving her any embarrassment, I told I don’t visit frequently.
I understand she is trying to make small talk and trying to know her client base. But if you cannot remember people (and I know it is not easy when you are running a business), then don’t ask such questions.
But I don’t mind this question as much as I mind those bitching comments about others work. What do they think that I believe their words? I know they are trying to increase their sales/business but really is lying or accusing other of bad work the only way?
Is it only me who has experienced this? Do you have similar experience?
PS: I now understand why they say “Never ask a barber whether you need a haircut.”
Looking Back
Recently I have been reading blog posts where bloggers have written about almost over 2011, their accomplishments, some new resolutions and some not so new resolutions.
I then realized, I had no goals (set in stone) for 2011. In the beginning of 2011, all I wanted was daily 10 mins for myself (lame I know..)
2011 told me that my diabetes which was supposed to go away after delivery, is still with me. 2011 also told me that if I try, I can live without medicines. 2011 also told me that I can lose all the baby weight and keep it off. We celebrated munchkin’s first birthday this year. I started blogging this year. I have become very emotional in last year. Earlier I was emotionally dead, but ever since munchkin, my inner gate has been opened. I cry at certain news, I cry at emotional scenes, I cry at someone’s store closing… I have to close these gates again, coz that’s so unlike me…
All in all, everything was/is normal.
For 2012, I hope that I get better in housekeeping (it’s a mess). I hope that I can take out 10 mins for myself on daily basis. I hope to stay off the meds, I hope that my patience grows, I hope that I become a better mother than I am right now….
I hope to continue blogging, if not writing then at least reading other blogger’s post.
I know this list is lame, but this is good enough for me….
Wish you and your family, a very happy new year…
